David Attenborough should do a documentary series on how desi moms search for their future daughter in-laws because the whole process of it is parallel to a mother lion hunting for her next catch or searching for a new home.
Desi moms are worldwide famous for finding the right kind of daughter-in-law for themselves than they are, for the perfect wife of their sons. The list of demands becomes even longer when they are living away from their home. Striking the right balance between modern and old-fashioned in a ‘bahu’ becomes a tough job for them.
However, things are not as difficult for them as they seem to be as we reveal some of the classic and some new ways of the bahu hunt:
Desis living abroad are part of a Desi lobby, that usually meets at gatherings and festivities. With Community centres, many families get the chance to know each other.
It’s the mosque, the temple, the local wedding hall or even the annual desi restaurant in foreign countries. That’s where desi moms gather and eye out their next bahu. On annual holidays and events, everyone’s gathered so you if you’re a ripe bachelor or bachelorette you are being watched.
The naïve/innocent girl may not notice it when she’s looking her best at Eid or Diwali but yeah you can be sure that some desi mom has pretty much made up her mind to fix her up with her son or nephew.
Trying to convince a fish that it is a bird would be easier than proving desi aunties wrong. All those pre conceived notions that they have built up over the years from the way their cultures and traditions are built upon have to be safeguarded through the next bahu.
And if their potential target is a strong independent woman who needs no man to take care of her then she is Dajjal or his cousin. That girl is never the favoured option according to desi aunties because she knows the loopholes and isn’t coming into their clutches.
Desi culture still doesn’t allow males and females to mingle casually, we’ve all had lengthy arguments about this and no one ever comes out the winner.
Specially in the case of the desi bahu hunt. If your mom can’t find you a wife or husband you know it’s the job of the dun…dun..dun… The Rishta Aunty aka Bahu Dementor.
She’ll move heaven and earth to find you the right suitor for your child and then go beyond lengths to prove that whatever family she brings up with is the best that you’ll ever come across and if you say no, its dishonor on your whole family for all eternity.
